Hey there!

Have you ever sought expert guidance only to be left feeling misunderstood? Or maybe, you understood but didn't get the results you expected when you followed their advice?

The problem might not be the advice itself, but the way you’re asking it.

Believe it or not, the quality of advice you get depends on the quality of the questions you ask.

The quality of the advice you receive depends on the quality of the questions you ask. By learning to ask clear, concise, and focused questions, you can unlock better answers that drive real progress in your business.

Unfortunately, most of us haven’t learned to effectively ask a question or to get a useful answer.

Nic Peterson, author of Bumpers, introduced me to the difference between valid answers and useful answers.

He uses the example question of “what is protein?”

Ask that question, and the answers you get vary widely:

“An essential macronutrient”

“A chain of amino acids”

“Food for your muscles”

Each answer is valid, but are they all useful? That depends on the goal of the question.

If you want to know about the molecular structure of protein, the most useful answer is the second one. The others are valid but not helpful.

You could spend days following valid advice that is neither helpful nor useful in your specific situation. As a business owner, that wasted effort doesn’t just cost you time. It also costs money and energy. Lost productivity is hard to reclaim.

So how do you ask an effective question? Here is my advice (hope it’s useful):

• Clarify what you want to achieve — Asking better questions starts by focusing on your goal. Do you want a solution? Do you want validation? Do you want to brainstorm ideas or talk things through?
  • Ineffective: How do I grow my community?
  • Effective: What are three cost-effective strategies for increasing visibility of my group among my target audience?
• Be specific and offer appropriate context – Provide enough background for the person to understand your situation but avoid unnecessary details. Don’t make the other person sift through non-essential information to uncover the heart of your question?
  • Ineffective: How do I increase engagement in my membership?
  • Effective: Given that I have 100 people in my online book club, what’s the next best step to get them having conversations in the group without me having to ask all the questions?
• Ask open-ended questions – Open-ended questions, when framed with intention, encourage thoughtful responses and open the door to deeper conversations.
  • Ineffective: Should I use Facebook ads to grow my group?
  • Effective: What factors should I consider when deciding whether to use Facebook ads for my group?
• Focus on one question at a time – Don’t be greedy. When you ask multiple questions at once, you’re leaving it to the other person to prioritize your needs and answer accordingly. Stick to one primary issue. Once that’s answered, move on to follow-ups if needed.
  • Ineffective: Should I start a free group or charge for it, and which platform is best for my community?
  • Effective: Based on my industry and goals, should I start a free group or a paid membership? [Wait for a useful answer.] Follow up with your next question.

Want to practice? Jump into The Secret to Thriving Online Communities today, where we have an AMA (ask me anything) thread going all day long.

Even if you don’t have a community-specific question, take the opportunity to practice your asking skills by using the advice above to effectively articulate what you want to know.

And if you want deeper advice on how to ask better questions, my friend Mary Williams at Sensible Woo has a whole training on it. If woo isn’t your thing, jump in at the 11-minute mark when Mary breaks down her framework for asking questions guaranteed to lead to useful outcomes.

On the Podcast: Top Episodes by Downloads

I’m two months into co-hosting The Business You Really Want with Gwen Bortner. It’s been a wild ride. We’re transitioning away from the production team we started with and now discovered we need to change hosting companies, too. Luckily, I have a high level of comfort with plans going sideways. And, because I have a co-host, I don’t have to shoulder the stress on my own. 😌

While we’ve been making lots of adjustments behind the scenes, episodes still drop every Tuesday. Listeners continue to write in to share the insights they are gleaning from the show, and to tell us how they are applying the tips we share.

As of today, the top episodes by all-time downloads are:

1. ​Goals — How to Set Goals You’ll Actually Achieve​
2. ​Effectiveness — The Art of True Delegation​
3. ​A Roadmap to Sustainable Success — Aligning the G.E.A.R.S. of Your Business​
4. ​Systems — Harnessing The Power Of Consistent Behavior​
5. ​Accounting — Making Sense of the Numbers That Matter​

If you’ve been listening, let me know which episode has been your favorite and why. Your feedback informs future episodes.

Keep thriving,

Tonya

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The Gathering Ground

FOR THE WEEK OF Oct. 14

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